Barackroll'd...

Diego sent this today. Love it!!!

Missouri loves company...

I should have warned you earlier...we were on the loose over Christmas. Living among man & beast in the Show Me State. It was our first trip to see my Mama & Step-Dad in Missouri!

When I booked our flight to leave on Christmas Eve, I just crossed my fingers and hoped for the best since I've heard so many horror stories about traveling over the holidays! But it was honestly the lightest day of travel I've ever experienced. The cab driver that picked us up said that the airport was a madhouse on the 23rd, so we lucked out!

On our flight from Austin to Dallas, we were seated in the emergency exit row, so our seats didn't recline at all. Then on our flight from Dallas to Springfield, MO, we were seated in the very last row, so our seats didn't recline! I enjoy themes. And I was pretty excited to see that we were directly across from the toilet:
















My Mom (Susan) and Step-Dad (Rick) picked us up at the airport and drove us to Panera for dinner. I met my cutiepie step-sister, Jennifer, for the first time...along with her boyfriend, Robert:














My beautiful Mama in high-school:




















I spent a little time with Rick's retired race horse, Bud. My new mane matches his pretty well:














Tractor #1:














Tractor #2:




















Rick's 1965 Mustang (covered in kitty prints...more to come on that):














They live right down the street from the old Route 66! We stopped by this awesome old service station:




















This truck was inside the old service station garage. The man that owns the place, invited us in and gave us root beer. :) Very sweet and I felt obligated to sip on it, but I haven't had soda in so long that it gave me a bellyache!




















My Mother has 10 cats. That's right. TEN. Plus two big mangy mutts and that giant horsey. How many pets do we have? Just one stray kitty that lives outdoors. Imagine my joy when I met their brood! I made a cat collage:
























One of my favorite things that happened was waking up the day after Christmas to the TV blaring in the living room...Rick was watching a "Keeping up with the Kardashians" marathon! I also learned that they're fans of one of my favorite shows, The Girls Next Door. :)

On our flight home, this lovely object marked the exits. It was flesh-colored. In that shape. I think the same person designed this that did that famous Little Mermaid cover...

















I'm glad we got to see the fam, but we are happy to be back in Austin!!

Stop! In the name of...

Yes! I must do something like this someday:

Give 'em what they really want...

Here at the Carl Miner Idea Group, we just love our Clients soooo much! I wish we could've done this for each one of them, but we had to pick two.

Desk #1:
Jon @ The Library Bar

We coordinated with a lady in their office to email us whenever he left the building. She sent a message last week and we showed up with a roll of wrapping paper and tape, then quickly wrapped as many items as we could that were on his desk already:














Desk #2:
Blake @ HigherOut

The people that work next door to us are hilarious, so we definitely had to work our magic for one of them! We waited til our buddy Blake left for the day to pimp his zone. This is me with my "innocent face":














When we arrived the next morning, Blake had taken some of the paper and wrapped our door! Including the door knob and lock. And to that we say "Touche".

Sweet Baby Jebus...

There's a secured internet connection at our office that someone named "Sweet Baby Jebus". I laugh every time I see that. Doesn't take much...

We played at the Generations Church Christmas Eve-Eve Service last week! The pretty little kiddies got up and did a sweetened & condensed version of the Nativity Story. Here's Mary (she was a young bride):




















This is Isaac at the rehearsal (he's more of a "dramatic" actor):

"It's not a tuna." -Arnold Schwarzeneggar, Kindergarten Cop

This is a quick and easy recipe that we whip up every now & then for sammiches!

Mock Tuna Salad
Just mash up one can of garbanzo beans and add anything you normally would to tuna salad. For this one, I added vegenaise, minced red onion, turmeric, salt, pepper, dill, and fresh basil! Served on homemade vegan bread with sesame crackers. mmmm....

Garbanzo beans (aka Chickpeas) are a helpful source of zinc, folate, and protein! They're also low in fat, but very high in dietary fiber...meaning they're a healthy source of carbs, even for people with diabetes. How 'bout that?

Mouse in the house...

A package was delivered to our office this week and it contained this little nugget of pink happiness:

















My Mister ordered a new wireless mousie for my computer. :)

Oh the wonders of Walmart...

Carl & I try to avoid Walmart at all costs, but every now and then, we end up there because it's the only place to get something...or every other store is closed.

The latter happened a few days ago. We've been working some lengthy hours and didn't leave the office until around 11pm. We needed food at home badly. Ketchup & vinegar were our only options in the fridge.

So after deliberating about the benefits of starving vs. going to the big W, Sam Walton won our business. And I must say, if you HAVE to go there, go in the middle of the night because we got to take our time perusing all the flavorful options for our little bellies...

For instance:
"Meal in a Bucket". Somebody paid a marketing team a lot of money to come up with that one. With this, you get 30 Crunchy Fishin' Sticks, Bacon Cheddar Shrimp Poppers, and 16 Loaded Potato Blasts!! Sounds like a party!
















And where else can you obtain ridiculously large tubs of mayo, syrup, cheddar cheese sauce, AND tobasco???
















Thank you, Walmart! Your staff always has that "I don't give a damn" and "I'd rather be anywhere than here" attitude that makes me smile. :)

Lovely Little Lady...

This is my "Little". I am now her mentor. Oh the poor child!! ;)

In all seriousness, she's a doll and I'm excited about getting to know her better and helping her any way I can!

Oh, and I love her even more because she thought I was about 20 years old. heehee...

Gingerbread housing...

Our friends, Lisa & Jamie, invited us over to make a gingerbread house last weekend! We had so much fun! Home sweet home:




















Look! They're "anatomically correct"!














Marissa is a doll!




















We're home builders now.

Fakin' Bacon...

Breakfast for dinner! These are organic garlic hashbrowns, fake bacon, vegenaise & ketchup for dipping, an orange from the Farmer's Market, and organic berry juice from Ben & Lori!

Community, part deux...

I wrote a blog last week about community and shortly thereafter, I read about two great examples to warm the cockles of your heart...

Numero Uno:::
I know these people, but I don't. It's complicated. A family of 5; Mom, Dad, and three handsome little boys. Daddy has been fighting cancer this year. Fighting hard, facing it like a man. Mommy seems as sweet as pie and just wrote this in their journal:

"...last night was Ken's company banquet. I am still blown away at the love Ken's partner's at work show us. It is unbelievable to me that these men we have known for only a little over 3 years, worked and gave us Ken's portion of unearned income to pay our bills. While Ken was fighting for his life those 5-6 months, these men gave him the peace and comfort of knowing that his family was being taken care of. They are amazing men and I am honored to know them."

I got goosebumps when I read that because that's EXACTLY how people should react when faced with this type of situation. Those men probably worked twice as hard so that they could take care of another man's family when they were in distress. They didn't have to do that. It's easy to feel sympathetic towards someone, it's another thing to do something about it!

The second example is this. I'll let our buddy Ross tell you in his own words since I enjoy the way he writes. ;)

Do you have any other examples to share with me?

How to be classy...

OH MY GOSH, this is so flippin' hilarious. My bro sent this and it's worth the time to read through...

Quote:

Matthew Apartment 3A A few weeks ago, a guy moved into the apartment across from me. I know little about him apart from the fact that he owns cane furniture as I saw the delivery guys carry it up. I bumped into him on the stairs once and he said hello but I cannot be friends with someone that owns cane furniture so I pretended I had a turtle to feed or something. Last week when I checked my mailbox, I found that my new neighbor had left me a note stating that he was having a party and to let him know if the noise was too loud. The problem I have with the note is not that he was having a party and didn't invite me, it was that he selected a vibrant background of balloons, effectively stating that his party was going to be vibrant and possibly have balloons and that I couldn't come. If I was writing a note to my neighbors saying that I was going to have a party but none of them could come, I would not add photos of ecstasy tablets, beer and gratuitous shots of Lucius going down on men to show them what they are missing out on, I would make it clean and simple, possibly even sombre, so they didn't think 'you prick'.

e-mails

Quote:

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 8 Dec 2008 11.04am
To: Matthew Smythe
Subject: R.S.V.P.

Dear Matthew,
Thankyou for the party invite. At first glance I thought it may be a child's party what with it being vibrant and having balloons but I realise you probably did your best with what little tools were available. I wouldn't miss it for the world. What time would you like me there?

Regards, David.



From: Matthew Smythe
Date: Monday 8 Dec 2008 3.48pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: R.S.V.P.

Hi David
Sorry the note was just to let you know that we might be a bit loud that night. The house warming is really just for friends and family but you can drop past for a beer sometime if you like.
Cheers Matthew



From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 8 Dec 2008 5.41pm
To: Matthew Smythe
Subject: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

Thanks Matthew,
Including me in your list of friends and family means a lot. You and I don't tend to have long discussions when we meet in the hallway and I plan to put a stop to that. Next time we bump into each other I intend to have a very long conversation with you and I am sure you are looking forward to that as much as I am. I have told my friend Ross that you are having a party and he is as excited as I am. Do you want us to bring anything or will everything be provided?

Regards, David.



From: Matthew Smythe
Date: Tuesday 9 Dec 2008 10.01am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

Hi David
As I said, my housewarming is just for friends and family. There is not a lot of room so cant really have to many people come. Sorry about that mate.
Cheers Matthew



From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 9 Dec 2008 2.36pm
To: Matthew Smythe
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

Dear Matthew,
I can appreciate that, our apartments are not very large are they? I myself like to go for a jog every night to keep fit but fear leaving the house so I have to jog on the spot taking very small steps with my arms straight down. I understand the problems of space restrictions all too well. If you would like to store some of your furniture at my place during the party you are quite welcome to - if we move your cane furniture into my spare room for the night and scatter cushions on the ground, that would provide a lot more seating and create a cozy atmosphere at the same time. I have a mirror ball that you can borrow. I have told Ross not to invite anyone else due to the space constraints so it will just be us two and my other friend Simon. When I told Simon that Ross and I were going to a party he became quite angry that I had not invited him as well so I really didn't have any choice as he can become quite violent. Sometimes I am afraid to even be in the same room as him. So just myself Ross and Simon. Simon's girlfriend has a work function on that night but might come along after that if she can get a lift with friends.

Regards, David.



From: Matthew Smythe
Date: Tuesday 9 Dec 2008 4.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

Wtf? Nobody can come to the houswarming party it is just for friends and family. I dont even know these people. How do you know I have cane furniture? Are you the guy in apartment 1?



From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 9 Dec 2008 6.12pm
To: Matthew Smythe
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

Hi Matthew,
I understand it is an exclusive party and I appreciate you trusting my judgement on who to bring. I just assumed you have cane furniture, doesn't everybody? Cane is possibly one of the most renewable natural resources we have after plastic, it is not only strong but lightweight and attractive. Every item in my apartment is made of cane, including my television. It looks like the one from Gilligan's Island but is in colour of course. Do you remember that episode where a robot came to the island? That was the best one in my opinion. I always preferred Mary Anne to Ginger, same with Flintstones - I found Betty much more attractive than Wilma but then I am not really keen on redheads at all. They have freckles all over their body did you know? It's the ones on their back and shoulders that creep me out the most.

Anyway, Ross rang me today all excited about the party and asked me what the theme is, I told him that I don't think there is a theme and we discussed it and feel that it should be an eighties themed party. I have a white suit and projector and am coming as Nik Kershaw. I have made a looping tape of 'wouldn't it be good' to play as I am sure you will agree that this song rocks and has stood the test of time well. I am in the process of redesigning your invites appropriately and will get a few hundred of them printed off later today. I will have to ask you for the money for this as print cartridges for my Epson are pretty expensive. They stopped making this model a month after I bought it and I have to get the cartridges sent from China. Around $120 should cover it. You can just pop the money in my letter box if I don't see you before tonight.

Regards, David.



From: Matthew Smythe
Date: Wednesday 10 Dec 2008 11.06pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

What the fuck are yout alking about? There is no theme for the party it is just a few friends and family. noone else can come IT IS ONLY FOR MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY do you understand? Do not print anything out because I am not paying for something I dont need and didnt ask you to do! look I am sorry but i am heaps busy and that night is not convenient. Are you in Apatrment1?



From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 11 Dec 2008 9.15am
To: Matthew Smythe
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

Hello Matthew,
I agree that it is not very convenient and must admit that when I first received your invitation I was perplexed that it was on a Sunday night but who am I to judge. No, I am in apartment 3B. Our bedroom walls are touching so when we are sleeping our heads are only a few feet apart. If I put my ear to the wall I can hear you. I also agree with you that having a particular theme for your party may not be the best choice, it makes more sense to leave it open as a generic fancy dress party, that way everyone can come dressed in whatever they want. Once, I went to a party in a bear outfit which worked out well as it was freezing and I was the only one warm. As it won't be cold the night of your party, I have decided to come as a Ninja. I think it would be really good if you dressed as a ninja as well and we could perform a martial arts display for the other guests. I have real swords and will bring them. If you need help with your costume let me know, I have made mine by wrapping a black t-shirt around my face with a hooded jacket and cut finger holes in black socks for the gloves. I do not have any black pants so will spray paint my legs on the night.

It is a little hard to breath in the costume so I will need you to keep the window open during the party to provide good air circulation. Actually, I just had a thought, how awesome would it be if I arrived 'through' the window like a real ninja. We should definitely do that. I just measured the distance between our balconies and I should be able to jump it. I once leaped across a creek that was over five metres wide and almost made it.

Also, you mentioned in your invitation that if there was anything I needed, to let you know. My car is going in for a service next week and I was wondering, seeing as we are good friends now, if it would be ok to borrow yours on that day. I hate catching the bus as they are full of poor people who don't own cars.

Regards, David.



From: Matthew Smythe
Date: Thursday 11 Dec 2008 3.02pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: R.S.V.P.

WTF? No you cant borrow my car and there is no fucking 3B. I reckon you are that guy from Apartment 1. You are not coming to my house warming and you are not bringing any of your friends. What the fuck is wrong with you??? The only people invited are friends and family I told you that. It is just drinks there is no fucking fancy dress and only people i know are coming! I dont want to be rude but jesus fucking christ man.



From: David Thorne
Date: Sunday 14 Dec 2008 2.04am
To: Matthew Smythe
Subject: Party

Hello Matthew,
I have been away since Thursday so have not been able to check my email from home. Flying back late today in time for the party and just wanted to say that we are really looking forward to it. Will probably get there around eleven or twelve, just when it starts to liven up. Simon's girlfriend Cathy's work function was cancelled so she can make it afterall which is good news. She will probably have a few friends with her so they will take the mini van. Also, I have arranged a Piñata.

Can't wait, see you tonight.

Regards, David.

Community...

Everyone should know about this website: www.carecalendar.org

Some beautiful folks we know recently set up a Care Calendar for a lovely woman who is going through chemo. The calendar allow you to go online and see what days she needs meals or help with various tasks. Then you sign up to fill the needs!

I'm sure there have been times when you know someone going through a rough situation and you wonder how you can help. Well, this is a perfect way to rally the troops and help your brothas and sistas!

We signed up to deliver a meal last week and made soup, salads, rolls, and apple slices with a little organic dark chocolate drizzle. Good stuff for the body.


It's only been in recent years that I've realized the importance of building community. I think it's absolutely essential for personal development to have relationships with people that are beyond the superficial. You wanna go...(sing it with me)...where everybody knows your naaame...and they're always glad you caaame...

They say it takes a village to raise a child. Well, adults are just older versions of children. You still need that village of people to be there for you in your later years. People that care about you and will help you when you're down. People that will support your ambitions and want to see you succeed.

I'm talking about real connections. Not the kind that happen with going to the club and doing some dry-humping on the dance floor. Community begins when people come together to make sure that every soul is included and accounted for. The strong help the weak. With that being said, to avoid this becoming socialism, each person must be personally responsible for being all they can be. And having a community of people you can look up to can make all the difference in getting up and then staying on your feet. The mark of a truly great man is reflected in his ability to make others feel like they can be great, too.

When building your community of friends, it's important to remember that the personalities you surround yourself with will be hugely influential in your own personal development. So choose wisely! Negativity can bring you down just as happiness and sunshine will brighten your days.

And you can't always just be the child in the village that everyone is tending to...depending on the charity of others to get what you want. You need to be part of the village, a worthwhile member of society. And to be worthy of kindness, you must be willing to give back what you give 10 times over. Earl calls it Karma. Religion threatens with heaven vs. hell. I say just be good for goodness' sake! Spread a little love butter on your toast, then share it. It's good and good for you.

Jizz in my pants...

Thanks, Blake!! Funny stuff. :)

Dreaming of Drullets...

Ok, so I had this random dream last night...

We went to visit Lynsey in Colorado and when I arrived, she told me that she had become a hair stylist and she wanted to do my hair. I said that I'm growing my hair out, so I only wanted a trim, but when she was done, she had given me a mullet with short dreadlocks!! It was atrocious. I woke up with low self esteem.

Back to reality...I googled this style and it's officially called a "Drullet". Who knew??

I love this kind of humor...

Chickie Little...

I met with my "Little" again today for lunch. She's seriously adorable. :)

Hands Free...

Thanks, Lyns! This cracked me up. :)

How to not get your ass kicked by police...

Edgy Veggies...

Nicole Lapin is one of the youngest CNN News Anchors ever and she's a Vegan. She also writes a great blog called "Young People Who Rock".


Carrie Underwood was voted the 2005 World's Sexiest Vegetarian!


Natalie Portman has been veg since childhood.


Curious about more famous herbivores? Here are some others:

Alicia Silverstone
Alyssa Milano
Andre 3000 from Outkast
Angela Bassett
Angie Everhart
Anna Paquin
Anne Hathaway
Anthony Kiedis
Ashley Judd
Avril Lavigne
Barry White
Benji Madden
Bernadette Peters
Billy Idol
Bob Barker
Bonnie Raitt
Brad Pitt
Brooke Shields
Bryan Adams
Chelsea Clinton
Chris Martin (Coldplay)
Claudia Schiffer
Christie Brinkley
Christina Applegate
Christy Turlington
Clint Eastwood
Corey Feldman
Daryl Hannah
Diane Keaton
Diane Warren
Doris Day
Dustin Hoffman
Eddie Vedder
Elijah Wood
Ellen Degeneres
Forest Whitaker
Gavin Rossdale
George Harrison
Gillian Anderson
Gina Lee Nolin
Hayden Panettiere
Ian McKellan
India Arie
Jack Johnson
Jamie Kennedy
Jamie Lee Curtis
Jared Leto
Jason Mraz
Jenna Jameson
Joaquin Phoenix
John Lennon
John Tesh
Johnny Cash (late in life)
Josh Hartnett
Joss Stone
Kate Winslet
Kevin Nealon
Kim Basinger
Kristin Bell
Leona Lewis
Linda McCartney
Lisa Kudrow
Mary Tyler Moore
Melanie Griffith
Melissa Etheridge
Michael Bolton
Mr. Rogers
Naomi Watts
Nelly (rapper)
Olivia Newton John
Omar Epps
Orlando Bloom
Pamela Anderson
Paul McCartney
Peter Gabriel
Petra Nemcova
Richard Gere
Ringo Starr
Robert Redford
Samuel L. Jackson
Sandra Oh
Seal
Shania Twain
Shannon Elizabeth
Steve Perry
Steve Vai
Tobey Maguire
Tracy Chapman
Travis Barker (Blink 182)
Vanessa Williams
Vanna White
William Shatner
Woody Harrelson

Debbie Downer...

I just read this article about happiness and the importance of building a positive community around you. Don't surround yourself with negativity as it has an adverse affect on your own outlook. I need to expand on this topic when I have time, but please don't be a Debbie Downer:

I Need a Silent Night...

My new Christmas song is up here: myspace.com/bethminermusic

cold outside, it's wintertime
scarves to ease the chill
spirit lost in counting cost
for one fine day of frills

i need a silent night
warm by fireside
soothe my woes
and ice cube toes
i need a silent night

wrap my frame in silky things
pour some peppermint
calm my mind until i find
life is sweet again

Prop 8, The Musical...

Put some stank on it...

We went to a double birthday party tonight for the beautiful My-Cherie and her friend Andy Brown. My-Cherie is a professional model and Andy is a political organizer, so there were oodles of pretty & interesting people, but then there was this SMELL...

I went to say hi to another girl and thought perhaps she had just bathed in a tub of dirty diapers, but then Carl joined me and said he smelled it in the other room. I looked around for the culprit and saw a tray shared ying yang style by broccoli & cauliflower. I picked the whole thing up and made Carl sniff each side. Neither was a winner.

So then my husbando said someone must have crapped their pants. There were no children at this event, mind you. This revelation made me immediately scan every fanny in the room. Innocent until proven guilty by unexplained "chocolate stains" in the rump region. I was sure to note that the cake was the only chocolate at the party and it had not yet been sliced, so no one was gonna pull a fast one on ME and say they accidentally sat on it.

After becoming the creepy chick staring at everybody's arse, I realized that no one was showing signs of the thunder down under, so I asked My-Cherie about the odor and she said it was the cheese. The cheese! I hadn't even noticed it in the corner, but dear god, it was trying to get my attention.

My-Cherie just happened to have brought a soy candle with her that she lit. Who does that?? She's an aromatic angel.

I thought of a few morals, you can pick the best one;
-your cheese should not smell like sh*t when having a party.
-always carry a candle in your pocket in case the cheese smells like sh*t.
-if you tend to crap your pants often, buy some of that cheese so you can blame it.

More Girl Crushes...

My theme today is 'girls with mixed heritage'. I really enjoy it when you have to really take in a woman's face to appreciate her beauty. The opposite of this...which screams instead of whispers.

Nicole Scherzinger is the lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls and she is an intoxicating blend of Hawaiian, Russian and Filipino:



Cardin McKinney is a singer/songwriter out of Nashville and her bio is not currently on her site, but I remember reading that she is a blend of ethnic wonderment:


Vanessa Minnillo is Irish/Italian/Filipino. I first saw her when she won Miss Teen USA in 1998, representing SC 110% better than her infamous successor. I won't hold it against her that she's dating Nick Lachey.

Christmas is coming...

I just finished writing a Christmas song on Saturday and my sweet honey pie of a husband booked some studio time for me on Wednesday to record it! I'll post it for free download on my Myspace page when it's done. :)