Another Public Service Announcement...

OJ is dangerous. The murderous football player AND the beverage. I went to pour a glass of the vitamin C delight when the shelf took a big bite out of my finger. Now that I think about it, maybe it's the refrigerator that's out to get me! Beware the giant icebox of doom!!!!!!!!!

Toe-fooey...

Most people know that we've been vegetarians for over 7 years now and one of the questions we hear most is "but how do you get your protein??". To have a well-rounded, healthy diet, you can't just eat the same foods and ONLY subtract the meat. You have to have a diet makeover. I thought I'd start sharing some of our recipes with you!

This is a Mock Egg Salad sandwich with grated carrots and mixed greens on homemade vegan bread. Accompanied by a baby gherkin, rosemary sage crackers, and carrot juice.

ER (entertainment room)...

I haven't spent any quality time in the old ER since I was a little girl, but we went there with some friends on Friday night. Don't worry, everybody's a-ok. My purpose for this posting is to share some of the totally badass incidents and people we witnessed...

1. A mexican dad with like 18 kids, all under the age of 10. One of the girls was laying down on two chairs and just kept yelling "can we get some blankets? can we get some blankets?" to no one in particular. The Blanket Fairy never arrived.

2. A black dad that looked like Shaq with his 3 kids that will obviously be successful athletes someday. The youngest spent most of the time upside down in his chair with his feet closer to God. The older two were engaged in a full-on game of volleyball using a crumpled paper towel.

3. At one point, all 18 mexican children + all 3 of the future star athletes entered our comfort zone to remind me why my uterus remains unadulterated. ;)

4. A large, curvy woman arrived at one point and Carl leaned over to say "I didn't know you could come to the emergency room for being too bootylicious".

5. There was an intoxicated man sitting in a wheelchair with a bicycle next to him. A police officer arrived and we overheard him say that the guy was really drunk and fell off his bike. But a short time later, the drunkard just got up and walked out some alternate exit in the back of the room, leaving his bike behind.

6. My award for sexiest patient goes to the lady that looked very similar to this:
She came in with her man (who happened to be equally as sexy, with hair that needed a trim about 3 years ago). He told the receptionist that his woman's back had been hurting and thought maybe she needed a pregnancy test. She actually appeared to be about 6 months preggers, but I'm no Doctor Miner. They brought in a bag with two brand new cell phones in boxes and then enjoyed a dinner of bubblegum and Dr. Pepper.

***
So next time you're in the mood for a show you can't buy tickets for, bring yourself to the ER. In fact, bring the whole family!!!

Pretty Bird...

Boogie Body...

This is SO awesome!!! Make sure you have the sound on...

Party Money...

Holy Sasquatch, these are so pink flamingo great!!! All taken at the CD Release Party...

Mad Money...

Love these!!!

Speedo Guido...

So...we were waiting to get on the freeway yesterday and saw this guy jogging by wearing a SPEEDO! Now that's confidence, my friends.

Special Delivery...

Look what the UPS man just brought me for Christmas!

Even Mo' Money...

Mo' Money...

Things are rolling along nicely with our Eddie Money posers. Here are some from the last few weeks. More coming soon!

Eddie Money, Carl, Me, Diego:























John Church:























Jeff McAdams:























Pretty Kate:























Josh Allen:

Party Poster...

Holy Dumpcake, Batman!

Yesterday, I started working on developing some new expletives.

You may think I'm lying about this next statement, but it's true; I've never once said the "F word"...well, out loud that is. But there are definitely some instances when it feels necessary to shout "WTF?!" or something equivalent. So here are a few I've created. I'm planning on working them -naturally- into conversations to see if they have the staying power to catch on...

"Beta Carotene!"
"Mr. Holland's Opus!"
"Salamander Stew!"
"Ted Nugent!"
"Posterboard!"
"Oh Wigwam!"
"Kia Rio!"

Other ideas are welcome. We can start a movement together & change the world!

2.5 Weeks...

Disc Makers received my complete "Minutes With You" project today, artwork and all.

They'll be doing the mastering (not related to the post below), duplicating, and packaging so it will be ready to go home with you at my CD Release Party on 8/23. It might even make you breakfast the next day, because it knows how to treat a lady.

Give yourself a hand...

A man was masturbating in the alley behind our office today.

Uncomfortable? Final Day

I'm sure you're even happier than I am to see my final post on this topic! I'll make it short & painless...

Our Schlitterbahn excursion has been changed to next week. I finally broke down and shared my incredibly personal problem with my friends on Monday. They were gracious and said they were totally fine with rescheduling. I felt completely relieved!

(here comes a word I've been wanting to use)

Whilst my little experiment was not completely successful, there were no negatives, only positives. It definitely lowered the cramps and pain, it was the "lightest" it's been in years, and my body feels strong and healthy from my diet and exercise!!

Uncomfortable? Day 2

So far, so good. I got up this morning, drank some cold raspberry leaf tea that Carl steeped overnight for me and ate some yummy granola. Then I went for a run...only 2 laps + 2 walking because it was flippin' HOT already.

After that I did 40 sit-ups, 20 twists and 10 back-bends before we went to a soccer game. We roasted like veggies in tinfoil, but it felt good to be out in the sun! Lunch was delish at Blue Dahlia Bistro: hummus/tomato/avocado/white cheddar sammies on homemade wheat bread with freshly brewed lemonade.

This afternoon I baked vegan raspberry shortbread and then for dinner I cooked vegan spaghetti bolagnese. Ran another 2 laps + 1.5 walking and did 100 tummy crunches!

I told Carl that if this experiment doesn't work, at least I'll be in sexy shape. ;)

Uncomfortable?

Aren't awkward topics fun? I've never been one to shy away from sharing personal details, but this one might be a little too close for some people's comfort. I apologize in advance. :)

We've been planning on going to this big waterpark called Schlitterbahn this coming Tuesday with a bunch of friends. And holy crap, guess what just happened...I started my period. Awesome. Not.

Now while most people would've just tricked their body with birth control pills, I am completely against taking pharmaceuticals. They are a scary epidemic in this country, but that's another blog...

So I spent this morning researching natural remedies for shortening it up. Turns out there are several homeopathic options to help! Strenuous exercise, primrose oil, and red raspberry leaf tea. Avoid dairy & meat (not a problem for me) because of the extra hormones.

So the first thing I did was go for a run. I ran 3.5 laps around our condo complex and walked another 2. It's quite peaceful jogging by yourself, you notice a lot of things that normally blend in to your surroundings. I noticed pretty purple flowers blooming, people out walking their puppies, and the way a cactus garden is better for catching stray trash than it is for beautifying.

Then I came back into the AC and did 20 sit-ups, 20 superman lifts, 20 tabletops, and 20 body twists. A shower was absolutely necessary at that point.

So now I'm off to Whole Foods to buy some red raspberry leaf and primrose oil. I'll update this blog again with my progress, so hopefully no one's too creeped out. ;)